Mmm, doughnuts...

When Magic Man and I were engaged I received some fabulous advice from a wonderful woman. She said, "Find your own normal." No two engagements, marriages, or couples look and act the same so there's no reason to compare and contrast oneself with anyone else. If I wanted to wear bright orange flats under my wedding dress then that was totally fine. It was our normal.

I find myself having similar problems during this pregnancy. Wondering if what I'm thinking or feeling is "normal." I know of the abnormal things; Magic Man already has orders that if he comes home and finds me eating paper to get to me the doctor stat. But what about wanting to eat a can of pineapple chunks for dinner? Or crying my eyes out when I watch an episode of The Office I've seen no less than 9 million times? Or sleeping at any time, anywhere, with or without drool? Or, you know, telling my husband that the baby is his child today because it's causing my hip to hurt.

Yesterday I had a moment of clarity on the whole normal issue.
I got heartburn for the first time in years.
From a DOUGHNUT.

That is not normal. But at the same time, during this season of life, it is 100% normal. So I'm giving up on trying to figure out if I'm a normal pregnant woman or not. I'm just going to go along day to day being the best pregnant woman I know how to be. It's a time of learning and growing and resting and taking care of myself in order to take care of my baby. If that means going to bed at 8 on New Year's Eve is weird--so be it.

Wednesday Wonderment

I hope everyone is having a wonderful holiday season! I spent most of Christmas with the stomach flu so I went from laying down at one home to laying down in another home and throwing up in undisclosed locations. Yesterday I started to feel human again and today I was able to return to work. I am so thankful for a job where I get to sit all day.

In going along with the title of today's post 'Wednesday Wonderment" here is a small list of thoughts and things that have amazed me about being pregnant.

1. My nails grow so fast! One day I'm normal. Next day I'm Wolverine.
2. I had an incorrect notion that maternity clothes were made to mask or cover up a pregnant belly. There is no reason for this thought other than ignorance. I was given a wonderful maternity sweater for Christmas and am amazed at just how... pregnant... I look in it.
3. Niblet can really move around! I started feeling Niblet move a few weeks ago. It was just a couple times a day if I was really paying attention but I don't need to wait for it any longer. I start feeling him in the morning and tell everyone he or she is waking up and he keeps on moving around throughout the day. It is the strangest, most wonderful, feeling ever. Magic Man got to feel Niblet move for the first time the other day and I could tell it was an awesome moment for him as well.

4. I am not a big drinker but, ever since finding out I was pregnant and being told I can't have something, all I want is a beer. A big one.
5. I have been blown away by people's generosity once they found out I was pregnant. The baby already has some outfits and booties as well as a blanket, a lunch box, a Halloween costume, and a book of bedtime stories just to name a few items given to us. People love babies and people love buying stuff for babies. I am more than willing to accept any and all gifts as I know that when the kid is 7 no one will want to buy him or her a new wardrobe the way they do now.
6. As much as people want to give you "things" they also want to give you advice. Unsolicited. I'm down with hearing about what your pregnancy was like as long as it's not too gross (this is all taking place in a uterus after all) but the advice from people who have never been pregnant or had any training in obstetrics or doula-ism (whatever it's called) blows my mind. One of the more popular phrases in my vocabulary these days is "I'll talk to my doctor about that." (I probably won't.)
7. To book end with number one, I am equally amazed at how fast my hair grows right now. I have been trying to grow my hair out for months because I am a chronic hair cutter. I get bored I cut my hair. I get depressed I cut my hair. I wake up on my left side and I cut my hair. Thanks to Niblet it's been a whole lot easier to just let my hair grow because it does so like Jeff Gordon. When I told a friend this she said "Man, if you had known that would happen you would have gotten pregnant a long time ago."

Happy Wednesday to everyone from me and Niblet!

No pants? No problem

The tagline of this blog is "How I learned to cut myself some slack." Here are some ways I'm doing just that this holiday season.

1. On Monday morning my size 4 jeans with a little stretch in them still fit. Hallelujah! On Tuesday they did not.

How I cut myself some slack:  Grandpa won't be the only one at the Christmas dinner table with his pants undone. Score one for pregnancy comfort. And belly bands.

2. Pregnancy hormones. They suck. They make me crazy. I'm not much of a crying gal and I do that on a pretty regular basis these days.

How I cut myself some slack: By realizing I get sympathy up the wazoo. "Do you need anything? A hug? Taco Bell? I can clean the kitchen?" I get my emotions out AND I get treated like a princess. Score.

3. Magic Man and I live on a pretty tight budget and I've gotten a little crazy about allowing myself to spend money on "stuff." I'll drop a few bucks for a cup of coffee or lunch with a friend but pay full price for, well, anything? Heck to the no.

How I cut myself some slack: I bought a belly band so I can walk around with my pants undone and not feel like a perv. I bought a body pillow so I stop waking up on my back in the middle of the night freaking out that blood is going to instantly stop going to my heart. And on Monday I'm going to drop the 30-40 bucks and buy myself a new, never worn, pair of maternity jeans.

4. Ever since I got married to Magic Man two and a half years ago I live a very self induced obligatory wife existence. I'm the wife so therefore i must work full time, clean daily, vacuum often, keep up the laundry, clean the kitchen, make dinner every night, etc. (FYI, Magic Man doesn't expect these things of me. He's great.) It was exhausting before I was pregnant. Now it makes me want to stay in bed all day.

How I cut myself some slack: "Honey, you're on your own for dinner. I'm having mashed potatoes for the 8th day in a row."
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We're in a season of love and joy and grace and merriment. Remember that those are gifts to give yourself as well. Merry Christmas.

Inspiration

This afternoon I found myself doing some awesome shower karaoke while listening to my LeAnn Rimes Pandora station. Her song "Light in Your Eyes" was dedicated to me by my Dad and every time it comes on I normally get a little teary eyed. Now that I have pregnancy induced emotional outbursts at the drop of a hat today was no different.

Life can take your dreams and turn them upside down...

And that's exactly what pregnancy did to me.

I had a plan. A good plan. A great plan. A plan that was going to take me places.
And then I took not one, but two, pregnancy tests.
The plan faded and crumbled and got thrown away with my birth control.

But. Now there's a new plan. Or at least the plan of making a plan. Part of the new plan is this blog which will (fingers crossed) become a book sometime in 2012 or 2013. These posts will be my thoughts and musings and rants on life as a pregnant woman. They will be place holders for memories almost forgotten. They will be combined to be the story of my pregnancy and how, through this pregnancy, I learned to cut myself some slack.

Keep coming back. I promise to be entertaining.